May 20, 2009

It's a Boy!!

If you noticed, by the countdown to the right, it is too early to have another child. Well, I have some personal news from the Marvin family. We now have an addition to our family and its a boy! He is 6'1 and 22 years old!

Apparently history repeats itself and it seems our personalities and interests mirrored each other in many ways. I will get to know him more when he, and his mother, come to visit us in August.

The results are in and they cannot rule me out as the father. They then added, according to the DNA match, there is a 99.99% chance that I am indeed his father. So I am a proud Daddy once again.

His Aunt found me on Facebook and we reminisced about my visit back when I was 17 on vacation from boot camp in the Military. Right after the visit, I was transferred to the Persian Gulf and we lost touch. Her Nephew, on Facebook, said "id like to talk with ya about something." which was odd and I started to think back. The minute I saw his picture I knew. He looks almost exactly like I did at his age.

I told his Mom that raising kids is very hard, but raising "me" is madness. Apparently she did a great job. He, thankfully, is a Christian and I told him at least we have all of eternity to catch up and make up for lost time. We broke the news to Abby by referencing Elf the movie how Buddy was looking for his Dad and wanted to know him. She laughed at me and is taking it well.

Patty and I found it so odd that I am extremely protective of my children, we never let them out of our sites with homeschooling and no baby sitters and such, to find out that this whole time a child of mine was growing up alone without his Dad.

Even if father of the year is out the window, hopefully he can find it in his heart to forgive me for being so young and out of touch. I hope he understands also that I love him very much and my heart aches for him. All I can do now is move forward with him, to whatever degree he wants me involved in his life.

tinyurl.com/ItsaBoy22

9 comments:

  1.      I'd say that you are controlling of your children, rather than protective. You home-school because you want to enforce your own dogma, rather than letting them draw their own conclusions.

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  2. Pvb,

    Rather than letting them draw their own conclusions? And you know this how? Or is this a bare assertion? I would expect more from you after this many years.

    According to God's Word they will not follow God just because I teach them something. No matter what I do, like it says in John 3:3 that only God can save. So it doesn't matter what I teach them right?

    If what you say is true then I should be an Atheist since that is all what my Dad taught me. Slam debunked?

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  3. Dan:

         "If what you say is true then I should be an Atheist since that is all what my Dad taught me."
         Did he also make sure that you didn't hear anything other than atheism? If you sent your children to public school, you could still teach them your dogma, but they would hear other perspectives and so you couldn't enforce it. Are these other points of view not what you are "protecting" them from? It's what it looks like to me. But that crosses over from protection to control.
         "According to God's Word they will not follow God just because I teach them something. No matter what I do, like it says in John 3:3 that only God can save. So it doesn't matter what I teach them right?"
         I don't take the alleged "god's word" as any valid authority. Research that I have read indicates that exerting such extreme control over the ideas children can hear will affect their beliefs. Indeed, if you really believed what you said to be "god's word" there, what reason would you have not to send your children to public school. According to your stated beliefs, it would have no effect on whether they were "saved." According to my beliefs, they might decide, given such exposure to other ideas, that christianity is nonsense.
         "Rather than letting them draw their own conclusions? And you know this how? Or is this a bare assertion? I would expect more from you after this many years."
         It is what it looks like to me. All I can see that you might say you were "protecting" them from by home schooling are ideas that contradict christianity. However, if I am wrong, I'm sure you can explain how you expose them to non-christian ideas. Or, perhaps, you could explain how preventing such exposure hadn't crossed your mind.

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  4. Hey, Grats on the kid dude,

    We used to debate alot I remember. We should chat more, I'd be happy to do it on peaceful terms as I've overcome alot of my hatred towards your belief.

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  5. Furyan,

    Wow, are you still alive? Thanks for the kind words. That is great to hear you are maturing. So, you are around 21 these days?

    I am very apprehensive about you being civil, but I will give you what God gave me, undeserved grace. :7)

    Welcome to the fray!

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  6. Dan,

    Well now, that is quite the revelation.
    One of my son's friends met his real father for the first time last year. His step father was with him and his mother since he was a baby and he told me his real father would never replace the father that raised him.

    I am curious if your son had a step father.

    This will definitely throw a new dynamic into your life.

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  7. Pvb,

    Did he also make sure that you didn't hear anything other than atheism? 

    Yup, besides my Mom's fascination with astrology. I had no clue until I took it upon myself to read the Bible cover to cover at age 23.

    If you sent your children to public school, you could still teach them your dogma, but they would hear other perspectives and so you couldn't enforce it. 

    Enforce or endorse? You do understand, that is not the ONLY reason I am homeschooling our kids right?

    But that crosses over from protection to control. 

    So you believe children should be out of control? Your parenting skills may just show those results. :7)

    I don't take the alleged "god's word" as any valid authority. 

    Yes, your anti-God presuppositions have been revealed many times in the past.

    Research that I have read indicates that exerting such extreme control over the ideas children can hear will affect their beliefs. 

    I certainly hope so! But how do you explain the 22 year old growing up without my influence and still liking the same things as I do that is almost mirror like, even Ron Paul?

    Indeed, if you really believed what you said to be "god's word" there, what reason would you have not to send your children to public school(?) 

    Many reasons, off the top of my head, things like pedophilia, gang/bullies influence, drugs, inferior education, false teachings, molesting teachers, prejudices against Christianity...

    However, if I am wrong, I'm sure you can explain how you expose them to non-christian ideas.  

    My daughter knows all about Atheism and evolution and is involved in some of these blog discussions. I am honest to them about everything, even Santa Clause and the Easter bunny.

    Besides, if I don't want her running in the middle of the street because she could get run over by a truck. Why in the world would I teach her to run into the street if she wants, but I would not if I were her? I am probably more assertive then you are but I do not shelter her from evil things because she will have to face them without me someday.

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  8. But how do you explain the 22 year old growing up without my influence and still liking the same things as I do that is almost mirror like, even Ron Paul?

    Maybe you had sex with someone who had the same beliefs as you and she spread them to your child. Maybe he's emphasizing your similarities to get to know you.

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  9. Flute,

    Time will tell. Yea I didn't really want to hang the entire conversation on that small point but your point is valid.

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